Why old friendships drift but the bonds do not when you move to Thailand

When I lived in the UK I had a healthy circle of good friends which started from my schooling days, where we formed strong bonds and common understanding, but as the years pass from living in Thailand the contact fell away.

Inevitable, I guess, even though the world has never been so well connected from technological advances. It is not as though the friendship had stopped, but the reason to speak had fallen away. We just live different lives to what we once used to share.

It is a shame as personally I have never found a friendship in Thailand that replaced the close bonds I had when in the UK, but again maybe this is to be expected as many of our friendship in the UK was formed whilst at school where you got to spend so much time together.

However, I also know that I am speaking from personal experience only here in Thailand. I do know people who are very active in social circles, like golf, and seem to have formed pretty decent new friends. Plus, since leaving the UK, my friendships have been replaced by my family – my wife and 2 kids.

Friendships may fade, but the bond doesn’t

Whenever I do return back to the UK on holiday, and this view is shared by all other expats I know, when becoming reacquainted with old school buddies again, it feels completely normal. Although many years may have passed and with only a handful of phone calls in between, the connection never dies. There is no awkwardness and it is as though I never left.

Friendship never dies; it simply grows stronger with time and distance.

In fact, in an article titled ‘8 reasons why old friends are irreplaceable‘ they explain it well. “Your oldest friends are often the mirror to ourselves. They know the essence of you and there’s nothing more comforting and happiness-inducing than the ability to be completely yourself with someone. ”

Leaving friends and family was the only tough decision I needed to make when I left the UK all those years ago now.The reality is all the other reasons for staying really did not matter.

Its strange in many ways also that when I do return back to Thailand, for a few weeks at least, I maintain a healthy contact and make that effort to catch. But, as the dust settles and we slip back into our normal lives again, that contact slows.